Doing it Proud for Love & Marriage - London Pride 2013

We've tried to focus this year on what Pride events offer women as traditionally lesbians and bi women have been invisible amongst the masses of events laid on or aimed at men.

With new organisers and a completely different approach to Pride, the March and the events put on for the community, there was a real opportunity to break away from Pride only being meaningful for a small section of the LGBT community.


This year, for the first time we had a Women's Stage (hosted by Candy Bar and supported by FindHrr with free entry).

This was a wonderful event and a great way to spend the day and be part of Pride, even if you don't enjoy marching.

We were treated to an extremely talented set of musicians, from rock to pop to folk. Highlights included:



Rita Payne, a duo who got us off to a fantastic buzzing start that took us into fast beated guitar, mellow harmonies and ending us on a smooth version of Michael Jackson's Billy Jean.

Woman_E brought bubbly Gaga-esque pop-tainment to the stage, getting everyone up and dancing and setting the tone for the remainder of the day.

Pyscho Delia retro-fied us to 80s poptasm with a day-glo performance of electric guitar and drums - and they certainly fired up the "man in the green t-shirt" who was clearly enjoying himself A LOT. Lara King did an amazing job of managing the hecklers and keeping the every growing crowd roaring for all the amazing acts.

N'Chyx

Lyrically Challenged perfection

The urban love was brought to us by Wolverhampton's cheeky N'Chyx who seduced the audience in style, and followed by the performance of the day from Lyrically Challenged Collective who's perfected performance left us with that "one love" that Pride is all about - on message and on point.

Comedy stylings and grace from host Lara King and a set from lesbian favourite Rosie Wilby ensured we chortled in between the music

Hosting the evening section of the stage, Adam All brought variety up a notice (see the photo for the full picture...) with a couple of numbers and introducing the last rocking act before DJ sets took over, The Cut Outs - 2 women, electric guitars - what more could a girl want?

Women were very well catered for in the official post March evening events taking place as well. Perhaps a little too well, as a range of 5-6 events meant some might have been stretched a bit too thin. 

Find all the photos here!

We attended Code at Green Carnation between 9pm - 1am and the Big Gay Bash after that. Both not as full as they could be, but still good to have a choice of events for both women only and mixed that encourage the Pride Party to continue to the wee hours. 

By Katie

Chica Bonita @ Candy Bar

Venue: Candy Bar

Date: Weds 26 June

Tickets: From £7

Extras: Chica Dollars, 5 for £5

Following the launch event at a dancing venue in Birmingham, Chica Bonita made it's welcome introduction to London with a sexy stage dance event at the Candy Bar on Wednesday 26 June. As Candy Bar is not a licensed lap dancing club, the event was an altered version of the Birmingham debut, but still managed to titillate and tease with sexy stage performances and mingling with the audience. By 10.30pm it was heaving. 

Four dancers represented a wonderful spectrum of lesbian identity - sexy femme, boyish androgynous and cheeky butch in glammed up outfits (don't worry the outfits did not stay on all night).

The audience was a little apprehensive to start, but the DJs and organiser Michelle encouraged a willing crowd to enjoy the show, give appreciation to the dancers and feel comfortable in what is still a new experience for many.

It is refreshing to have this kind of event for women only - lesbian/bi women only in a very safe space and dancers who have insight into women's tastes.

The atmosphere was further enhanced by musical performances from Miri Hersh and Zara Sykes to get us in the mood. 

Find out more & follow: https://www.facebook.com/clubchicabonita

The next event
Chica Bonita's next event takes place at The Candy Bar in Soho.
Wednesday 31 July 8pm-3am. Tickets are only £7 each. There are also special drinks promotions. Details of all of the acts, the event and tickets are available here:http://chicabonitaclub.com/events/

By Katie

An Audience with Martina Navratilova

Sunday 23 June 2013 in London

 
I don’t think this has ever happened before….two famous lesbian icons in the same room talking in a friendly, relaxed and open environment to a theatre full of mainly gay women?

Well on Sunday 23 June 2013 it did happen and I was fortunate enough to be one of those lucky gay women who a few years ago could never have imagined a scene like it.  Such was the enormity of the occasion that I really feel I experienced a landmark event in LGBT history. 

There was Martina Navratilova and Clare Balding sitting opposite each other as if they were in their front room having a good old catch up.  The range of topics scaled from Martina’s coming out experiences during the turbulent political times of the 80’s to how can Martina help someone in preparing for their first tennis match in 30 years for the Out Games. It was extraordinary!

It was also a wonderful platform to ask Martina more or less anything.  And believe me many women had waited years (in some cases almost a lifetime) to pose their question to the woman who in their eyes paved the way for women to be comfortable with their sexuality, to be bold, to be brave and not be scared of who you are. I don’t think any of us, possibly not even Martina knew the impact on her coming out would have on our lives.  For thousands of women this was a life saver, a life line. Suddenly there was someone out there speaking for us. To use an old cliché but the best one….we were not alone anymore.  And I know I was one of those women. This is one of the many reasons why Martina is the icon she is.

Martina answered all the questions honestly and with an empowering conviction that only someone who has dealt with the homophobic backlash so publicly could do. She is a formidable activist for gay rights and a woman we are proud to have as part of our community.

It wasn’t just Martina though who answered the questions. Clare Balding gave her own strong views and together they complemented the different opinions that came from either side of the pond. Every woman in the theatre acknowledges the impact and importance of Clare Balding’s coming out has had in the UK. She is truly an inspiration and a voice for all of us and this keeps coming through the more I see and talk to her.

To end my short synopsis of the afternoon Clare Balding needs to have her own chat show. She was absolutely brilliant, quick witted, charming, engaging, relaxed, attentive and most importantly down to earth. The US has Ellen, we have Clare.

Jennifer GrantDiva Destinations

Are you hAPPy with Brenda, LezFindr, Dattch & FindHrr? We tried and tested them all!

These days most of us have a smartphone, it is surgically attached to us and we use it to communicate. Additionally we us social media. There are a number of apps now available for lesbians to find each other, so I've downloaded them, played about with them and have reviewed them here so you can choose the right one for you!

Either read through the whole review, or jump to the app that you like the sound of!

Brenda | Lezfindr | Dattch | FindHrr

 

 

Brenda

 

Rules to enter the app:
1. Over 18
2. Identify as female
3. will not post sexual photos or text and understand it is not a sex app

Usage Rules:

• Photos must be non-sexual and they must feature you .. no porn, no photos from the internet, we can spot fakes a mile away!
• Most genuine girls don't say filthy things on their profile, if you do .. it'll make us look at it twice. We're very good at telling the difference between the things a man pretending to be female would say as opposed to a real female
• Don't contact other users out of the blue saying filthy things, for the same reason as above
• Abuse of any kind will not be tolerated! Be nice, or be somewhere else!
• Genuine trans users will always be welcome on Brenda as long as the above rules are obeyed, transphobic abuse will not be tolerated

Best Feature: list view shows name, age, height, intro and image at a glance


LezFindr - www.lezfindr.co.uk

This app doesn't work very well on an iPad. It freezes but the basic function is to see who has the app and chat with them.

This app is free, and you can report users with a simple click.

All photos are vetted before being uploaded.

This app is available on Android and iPhone which is a benefit over some of the other apps, but it needs some of the bugs working out.

Best feature: simplicity of seeing a list of all women



Dattch - www.dattch.com

This app has a simple design and function. See women who are online, click on their photo to see how far away they are and chat with them.

The main benefit of this app is that it is very secure. Access to the app is invitation only, and even then you have to register, receive a link, send a Facebook message to Dattch via their page with your name, age, location so they can vet you, and then you get an access code linked to your email so you can't share it with others. This does make registration a little laborious, but you can be sure that users are genuine.

Best feature: simplicity to use. Reliability of app

FindHrr - www.findhrr.com

This app offers more that most and is trying to be more than a chat app. You can see what venues and events are nearby as well as women. You can chat, like and favourite users and rate events and venues.

This app offers international listings, which is no mean feat, I mean there are hundreds of events in London alone, never mind worldwide! Sadly this means that the listings are not exhaustive, or 100% accurate. We found a few events that had ended and there was a lot missing. There is the ability to rate an event but no obvious way to report inaccurate listings. The map function is useful for being out and about but I would probably back up with a search online to check the event is still running.

All women are listed and you can sort by online or distance and a green dot indicates women are online

Best Feature: map of all women!

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In addition to all of the above which can be free, there is also Girl Dates Girls Community. Free to download, but you have to pay to actually use it. Has good reviews but with free options above I'm not sure this is really worth the risk unless you have tried all the others.

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So, which one will you download? If you use any of these apps, or know of others, why not share your experience here?

Chica Bonita launch (and news of the next one in London!)

When: 26 May 2013
Where: Legs 11, Birmingham, B5 4ST (Chica Bonita will tour England)
Age: Over 18s only
Website: http://chicabonitaclub.com/
Price: £15

Chica Bonita: more politics please, we’re lesbians.

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Naïve isn’t usually a word used to describe me. But when I read that Chica Bonita (http://chicabonitaclub.com/) was “influenced by the traditional Gentlemen's Club”, I imagined Playboy bunny-cigarette girls and Christina Hendricks’ curves, all 1950’s sophistication (actually, I imagined Christina Hendricks’ curves a lot).

Who wouldn’t enjoy a bit of that?

Quite a few feminists, apparently. Responses from friends included: “I don't think sex is something for 'entertainment’” and “Is this another way for women to be exploited ... by other women?”

Chica Bonita promised, “to offer the ultimate club culture and sensual entertainment, tailored specifically for lesbians, bisexuals and those in question”.

It was a strip club.

Dashed were my illusions of bunny tails on satin-skinned bottoms and Christina Hendricks, bare shouldered, and falling out of her wiggle dress for me.

It was a clean and attractive strip club, though. Rose petals and battery operated tea lights gave the tables a tacky-but-safe touch of femininity.

Throughout the night, dancers made reasonably impressive moves on the upstairs pole, while the lower bar, with poles at either end, was occasionally used as a downstairs dancing platform.

There were about 20 young women in various shapes, colours, orientations and states of dress. They were mostly femmes, while a few bois and butches mingled later. Most seemed cheerful, but a couple slouched in chairs with scornful faces.

“Some aren’t happy about it.” That’s what Isabella said when I asked what the regular staff thought of being invaded by women for the night.

Isabella approached me almost as soon as I sat down. I didn’t expect it and felt like I’d lost my sense of power, a little accosted even. Her body language suggested she wasn’t entirely comfortable, but she was friendly (it’s her job), we chatted (it’s her job) and soon enough she offered me a lap dance (it’s her job).

I was propositioned with a lot of lap dances. Ladies forced themselves between my friend and me, and offered it almost in the same breath as their name. It showed just how much the methodology is still tailored toward men. After all, you never interrupt two women deep in conversation.

They’re there to make money whether the clientele is male or female.

20 years ago, to sit in a strip club and be entertained as a lesbian would have been unheard of. It’s possible now thanks to the feminists who fought for us back when being a Playboy bunny was one of the few career options women had (pre-marriage, of course).

No doubt Chica Bonita is a fun night with the security of female-only company. It needs fine-tuning before it really hits the mark, though: like a better understanding of the psychological and emotional differences between men and women.

But it’s a privilege to be part of a community that’s evolving and inventing itself. It’s also nice to look at sexy, young women. And it’s funny how things come full circle.

By Raegan Krista
http://anomalyofanormallife.wordpress.com

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Feedback from the organisers
We spoke with the organisers of Chica Bonita to find out how they thought the event went. They have learnt a lot. They had a lot of dancers on the first night and following the event they now know which dancers work well with lesbians, and which can be used again. They're also looking for new lesbian dancers. If they continue to receive feedback, improve from each experience, this night will continue to grow and go from strength to strength. Although clearly not for everyone, this event offers a different type of night for those who do enjoy a night of entertainment in a safe environment.

The next event
Chica Bonita's next event takes place at The Candy Bar in Soho.
Wednesday 26 June 8pm-3am. Tickets are only £7 each. Entertainment at this event includes Zara Sykes, Miri Hersh, DJ Lola. There are also special drinks promotions. Details of all of the acts, the event and tickets are available here: http://chicabonitaclub.com/events/